Right. Well. Here we go.
Honestly I feel like this is the equivalent of me writing my Tinder bio and by this I mean that I’m going to take 17 years to settle on a final draft that nobody will actually read because everyone has already swiped past. But positive vibes and here we are.
Although these may not seem the most poignant to all of you millions of readers (shoutout to my mom on her Android) honestly I am SCREAMING because these are pure things that I would imagine I would include in various episodes of the sitcom of my life. Brace yourselves.
Since moving here,
- I have increased my Instagram story uploads by tenfold and I am fully aware of this problem but I cannot stop myself because I apparently have this incessant need to let everyone know that I am having brunch in Brixton or am going to see a show (again). I profusely apologise to the four followers who actively view my aforementioned stories and for those who don’t you can catch them in my highlights @ alexbermy x
- I have kissed one member of the Queen’s Royal Guard but I still don’t have an invitation to Harry and Meghan’s baby’s christening and honestly I am absolutely raging.
- I have been let go from a job via WhatsApp voice note at midnight. What. A. Skit.
- I have been told that the Cork accent is unbelievably attractive and most definitely sexy. This boy has obviously never listened to Neil Prendeville on 96 and/or RED FM or seen “The Young Offenders” (now streaming on Netflix and BBC iPlayer if you’re lookin x).
- I’ve had the absolute JOY of working on two theatrical internships which have opened my eyes to the world of theatre in London which is essentially a huge part of the reason that I came here so I am forever grateful for these two amazing opportunities.
- I pulled a Rapunzel and chopped all of my hair off, followed by getting my braces off and not gonna lie I was feelin maself in the style of Beyoncé and played out a 90’s rom-com makeover montage anytime I walked down Chiswick High Road. And then I went home for Christmas. End scene.
- I have eaten approximately 436000 pieces of avocado toast. This is everywhere. You will never not be privy to it.
- I have started to use words such as “commute”, “babe” and “brunch” far too regularly and rather unintentionally yet they hold a solid place in my vernacular and can be used both separately or together – E.G. Babe, how long is our commute to brunch? I hate myself.
- I have developed the most unnatural amount of Irish pride. Anytime someone asks me where I’m from I’m honestly about two seconds away from morphing into the Mayor of Cork, reciting the proclamation and naming every stall in the English Market. Like if I were a food I would be Denny’s smoked bacon on McCambridge Soda Bread with Kerrygold Butter and Ballymaloe Relish and a cup of Barry’s to accompany it. Ireland is great. I miss ya.
Much more to come and much more that I have forgotten as I have now been here ten months (?!?) and have forgotten a whole lot of it.
Much love and respect to ya,